Why You Can't Get the Career You Worked So Hard For & How to Turn it Around!
So, you spent all of this time and money getting an education, so that when you finish, your future will be brighter and you'll have an exciting career.
Then you graduate.... Now what?
You hit the ground running, applying to jobs everywhere. You get a few callbacks... but still no job. What could be wrong?
It's gotta be the economy, right?
Wrong....
Have you ever heard of Imposter Syndrome?
According to Psychology Today, Imposter Syndrome is: A pattern of behavior where people doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent, often internalized, fear of being exposed as a fraud.
In other words, say you want to be an microbiologist. You go to school for it... but after you graduate, you don't think you are good enough to do the job... and even if you do get the job, you will be called out as an "imposter".
"Who does this guy think he is, trying to be a microbiologist... he's not an microbiologist like the rest of us", is what you're imagining someone else saying in your mind.
You don't believe in yourself, therefore you lack the confidence to interview, let alone even do the job... and you don't get hired. It's a vicious cycle.
Have you ever heard of Imposter Syndrome?
According to Psychology Today, Imposter Syndrome is: A pattern of behavior where people doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent, often internalized, fear of being exposed as a fraud.
In other words, say you want to be an microbiologist. You go to school for it... but after you graduate, you don't think you are good enough to do the job... and even if you do get the job, you will be called out as an "imposter".
"Who does this guy think he is, trying to be a microbiologist... he's not an microbiologist like the rest of us", is what you're imagining someone else saying in your mind.
You don't believe in yourself, therefore you lack the confidence to interview, let alone even do the job... and you don't get hired. It's a vicious cycle.
If you go into a job lacking the confidence and believing that you don't deserve the job or the pay rate, you're not likely to get the job.That's the unfortunate truth.
What's funny is that I've seen people with the least amount of self confidence have the most talents and abilities in their line of work. But usually, it's the cocky and arrogant ones who don't know shit, that always get the job because of their confidence in their own abilities... and that's how they slip past and get through. That's some B.S., huh?
If you grew up in poverty, like I did, you are going to have a difficult time shaking this imposter syndrome mindset.
Negative thoughts will go through your subconscious mind, such as:
You, my friend, are your own worst enemy!
You need to knock that shit off right now!!
You didn't do all this schooling and go into all of that student debt for nothing! Not to mention, no amount of college is going to teach you how to value yourself or think for yourself. Unfortunately, that's something you have to do on your own.
Stop waiting on permission from your mom, your co-worker, your boss, your professor, your friend, or anyone else who's not in your shoes! You decide what your destiny is... and nobody else! Got it?! Good!
Going into new territory is scary for anyone, and can be crippling when you don't know what to expect. Especially if you're not generally a confident person.
There is a way to break this cycle, but you have to be willing to do what it takes! What I'm about to mention might seem trivial, but they are vital in conditioning you into getting the career you aspire to do!
HOW TO BREAK THE IMPOSTER SYNDROME CYCLE:
This sounds a lot like the law of attraction, right? It is, but if you don't believe in it, that's okay .... you don't have to... all you have to believe in is the fundamental principles of psychology, which if you went to college, I would think that you'd at least believe in that.
The key here is to expose yourself to what you want as much as possible, so that you'll get used to it and it will become normal to you. It's only a matter of time before you become comfortable being a part of the "microbiologist" culture (or the culture of whatever career you've set out to do).
Here's a quote that's in a journal I created, which will help you to remember this principle:
Speaking of journals, here's something that can help you get out of the trenches of imposter syndrome. It's called the Happy Bitch Journal. Check out this funny little video.
Keep these principals in mind... follow the steps above, and before too long, you'll be doing the career that you've dreamed of doing all along.... and eventually, you'll get so used to it, that you'll come to a point where you'll wonder why you thought it was that big of a deal in the first place, and that's when you'll realize it's time to move up the ladder to the next phase in your career.
If you follow these steps, and get hired at your dream job afterward, please come back and let me know in the comment section below! I love to hear success stories!
What's funny is that I've seen people with the least amount of self confidence have the most talents and abilities in their line of work. But usually, it's the cocky and arrogant ones who don't know shit, that always get the job because of their confidence in their own abilities... and that's how they slip past and get through. That's some B.S., huh?
If you grew up in poverty, like I did, you are going to have a difficult time shaking this imposter syndrome mindset.
Negative thoughts will go through your subconscious mind, such as:
"I've never made this kind of money before, I'm not worth that much money."
"I haven't been around these kind of people before. I don't know think they'll be able to relate."
"How's it even possible for someone like me to the same job as that clean cut Harvard graduate guy over there."
"The only jobs I'm familiar with are the low paying ones"
"I knew I wasn't good enough to do this kind of job, maybe I need some more college training"
IMPOSTER SYNDROME feels like you're showing up to a party that you weren't invited to.
Does it give you anxiety just thinking about it?"I haven't been around these kind of people before. I don't know think they'll be able to relate."
"How's it even possible for someone like me to the same job as that clean cut Harvard graduate guy over there."
"The only jobs I'm familiar with are the low paying ones"
"I knew I wasn't good enough to do this kind of job, maybe I need some more college training"
IMPOSTER SYNDROME feels like you're showing up to a party that you weren't invited to.
You, my friend, are your own worst enemy!
You need to knock that shit off right now!!
You didn't do all this schooling and go into all of that student debt for nothing! Not to mention, no amount of college is going to teach you how to value yourself or think for yourself. Unfortunately, that's something you have to do on your own.
"Stop waiting on permission from people who don't live your life" ~ Unknown
Stop waiting on permission from your mom, your co-worker, your boss, your professor, your friend, or anyone else who's not in your shoes! You decide what your destiny is... and nobody else! Got it?! Good!
Going into new territory is scary for anyone, and can be crippling when you don't know what to expect. Especially if you're not generally a confident person.
There is a way to break this cycle, but you have to be willing to do what it takes! What I'm about to mention might seem trivial, but they are vital in conditioning you into getting the career you aspire to do!
HOW TO BREAK THE IMPOSTER SYNDROME CYCLE:
- Believe that you can break the cycle- If you believe it, you will see to it that it's done! If you don't believe it, you'll give up at the first sign of failure. Simple as that.
- Put yourself around other people who are making that kind of money and more.
- Submerge yourself into the field you want to work in, whether that's interning, volunteering, or just going and observing others doing the job. All it takes is some phone calls, emails, or going to some events to network to get your foot in the door. You can also join some facebook groups or some meetups.
- Visualize yourself making that kind of money and doing that kind of job. Make a vision board of work areas, items that you'd be using at the job, and people working the job. Also, include the kind of money you'll be making and the things that kind of money can buy. You can even write out a budget to make it more realistic.
- Say to yourself: I am a ___________________ (whatever career that you want).
This sounds a lot like the law of attraction, right? It is, but if you don't believe in it, that's okay .... you don't have to... all you have to believe in is the fundamental principles of psychology, which if you went to college, I would think that you'd at least believe in that.
The key here is to expose yourself to what you want as much as possible, so that you'll get used to it and it will become normal to you. It's only a matter of time before you become comfortable being a part of the "microbiologist" culture (or the culture of whatever career you've set out to do).
Here's a quote that's in a journal I created, which will help you to remember this principle:
"You become what you surround yourself with"
Speaking of journals, here's something that can help you get out of the trenches of imposter syndrome. It's called the Happy Bitch Journal. Check out this funny little video.
Keep these principals in mind... follow the steps above, and before too long, you'll be doing the career that you've dreamed of doing all along.... and eventually, you'll get so used to it, that you'll come to a point where you'll wonder why you thought it was that big of a deal in the first place, and that's when you'll realize it's time to move up the ladder to the next phase in your career.
If you follow these steps, and get hired at your dream job afterward, please come back and let me know in the comment section below! I love to hear success stories!
